I Am Still Looking For The Head Of My Son

By:  Anne Paq/Activestills.org - The "buffer zone", the "no-go zone", the no man’s land, whatever you call it, is a scary and devastated place. It is also deadly for the few ones who still dare to go there.

In this zone, whose borders are decided by bullets, every week, some Palestinians are fired upon. They do not even know from where the bullets or the shells come from.

On 13 September 2010, 91 year-old Ibrahim Abu Sayed, together with his 17 year-old grandson, Hossam and the young boy’s friend and neighbour - 16-year-old Ismail Abu Oda, went to Ibrahim's lot of land, with their cattle. The day was expected to be nice.

 They prepared for barbecue and tea but it turned into a nightmare. The first shell fell, and then another one- closer, and then the third one hit them directly. The last one killed the two boys and the old man, along with all their animals.

Their bodies were mutilated. Ismail’s father told us when we visited them that he knew what happened was not clearly not a mistake: "[…]the Israeli soldiers knew them, they were always going to that land lot. They [Israeli soldiers] knew all the farmers there. A 91 year-old and two boys- are they terrorists??!".

Later, the Israeli Army admitted it was a mistake. Another deadly mistake. Today, again, another boy was injured by shells fired in the north of Gaza while the boys were collecting rubble that will then sold. These “mistakes" are in fact acts of terror against unarmed civilians, who dare to stand on their own land, in direct view of Israel’s Army. Perhaps the real crime for Palestinians is that they remain visible, in Israel’s sight.. Perhaps it is easier to oppress other people when you do not actually see them.

While I was working in center of Gaza, near the buffer zone, I was told not to point my camera in the direction of the fence, although we were at least 1 km away from it. And when my colleagues and I tried to park our car on the side of the road, a local man told us not to leave the car there: "That will be suspicious", he said, and at that point I asked "are we allowed to breathe? Is that suspicious, as well ?".

What was striking with regards to that location, was that on one side (East) one could see the fence, and on the opposite side ,(West) one could see the Mediterranean Sea. It was then that I realized just how tiny the Gaza Strip really is. By pushing Gazans further away from the fence, the Israelis actually push them into the sea, an all too familiar expression, except than usually the Israelis are using it arguing than “Palestinians want to push us into the sea”.

According to Walid, Ismael's father, they are now even more scared to go back to the lot of land. they own. He sometimes goes back before dawn, still searching for his son’s head that was never recovered after the shelling. One morning, he picked up a piece of flesh off a tree, but he not certain it was part of his son’s body. It could have been a piece of a dead animal. The man said his son, Ismael was a loving and respectful son- a clever boy with great mechanic’s skills.

As the boy’s father was showing us the flechettes, which were inside the shell that killed his son, I felt as the flechettes struck my own heart. As painful as this true story is, I will live on. Ismael on the other hand was not given the right to live, just as many Gazans that will continue to fall victims of the countless "errors" that have yet to come.

This story was published based on authorization by the author